Ciel Onger, a sophomore, is an art education major in Ball State University’s College of Fine Arts.

I came to Ball State University thinking of college as a place where I could start over, be who I really wanted to be, and do things the way I wanted. But doing that meant learning to step outside my comfort zone.

I chose Ball State for a couple of big reasons. In high school, I was able to take Ball State courses at no cost and earn college credit. Ball State was also the most affordable university that accepted me. Those things showed me that Ball State was the right choice for me.

What made me most nervous was the idea of having to make connections all over again. I knew very few people on campus before I arrived, and I wasn’t exceptionally close with the people I did know.

The way I overcame that fear was pretty simple: I literally just made connections.

I went to events and club meetings even though I was scared that everyone else would already know each other and no one would want to talk to me. In the end, it paid off. I’ve met some of my closest friends because I put myself out there and went to those events and meetings.

That’s also one of my proudest accomplishments at Ball State. In high school, I would never have gone to something like that without someone I already knew accompanying me. I always needed a buddy. Finding the courage to walk into those spaces by myself showed me that I was capable of doing something I hadn’t thought I could do before.

I eventually realized something else: Other incoming students were just like me. They didn’t know a lot of people, either, and they were nervous about meeting new people, too. Once you realize everyone else is feeling some of the same things you are, making new friends becomes a whole lot easier.

One adjustment that hasn’t been as easy is switching between living at home and living on campus. It feels like once I get adjusted to one place, I have to leave it for the other. Then I get comfortable there, and the whole process starts over again.

The Counseling Center has been especially helpful to me with that adjustment. Early in my first semester, I jokingly told my friends that I had only needed therapy once in my life; the reason I went had ended, and I’d never need to go again.

I spoke too soon.

By the middle of my second semester, I found myself calling the Counseling Center to make an appointment. The people I met with were kind and willing to listen. They also helped me understand that you don’t need a huge reason to reach out. Something like struggling to adjust between living on campus and living at home is valid to talk about, too.

For other first-generation students, I would say this: Don’t let your previous situations or responsibilities keep you from succeeding academically or socially in college. Put yourself out there, even when doing it by yourself feels uncomfortable. The people around you might be just as nervous as you are.

For me, college became an opportunity to start over and think about who I really wanted to be and how I wanted to live.

You can choose your own life.